


Ditch This Nation With Me

by starsinthesunlight



Series: Tommy and Tubbo Run Away AU [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Light Angst, Personal Canon, Pre-Manberg Festival on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo and TommyInnit Run Away, and they are very tired, give these kids a break they're literally teenagers, they are best friends your honor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:33:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28744800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsinthesunlight/pseuds/starsinthesunlight
Summary: Tubbo losing his second life was the last straw.They'd thought about it a lot already. It'd be a change of page, a fresh breath for their mental health. Something they both deeply needed, more than they'd admit to anyone else.Trudging through the constant paranoia and concern for the other's disinterest in their own health, they make it to peaceful, sleepless nights staring at the stars, sarcastic remarks exchanged quicker than lightning, barefoot races down grassy fields, and familiar jokes.They start to feel waves of something they haven't felt in a long time.Safety.Maybe they'll be alright after all.
Series: Tommy and Tubbo Run Away AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2107380
Comments: 10
Kudos: 70





	Ditch This Nation With Me

**Author's Note:**

> The announcement of the war on November 16th is made five days after Tubbo's execution.
> 
> TW // fatal wounds, mentions of blood, swearing, mentions of war and gunpowder, bandages

"Ow. You're not very good at this," Tubbo complained as Tommy tried his godforsaken best to wrap his friend's wounds up for the fourth time that week.

"Shut up! I'm doing my best, Tubbo, don't be a bitch," Tommy hissed through a frown, concentrating on bandaging the wounds just right. It proved to be a difficult task when Tubbo just wouldn't sit still. "Stop moving, you're going to get an infection," Tommy warned, sighing for maybe the third time in the past few minutes. Tubbo heard the frustrated edge to his voice and stilled, muttering an apology as Tommy tried his best to use as little of the gauze and antiseptics as he could without putting his friend at any more of a risk. He had learned that every supply had to be used sparingly when you lived in a cold ravine with not much more than just the bare necessities. Tubbo stiffened, wincing and biting back another complaint for Tommy's sake. Tommy looked over the wrappings again, making sure that everything was patched to the best of his ability. He was no medical professional, but with both of his brothers constantly sparring throughout his childhood, Tommy had picked up basic first aid quite quickly. It had proved its use in the past couple of days especially.

"It hurts," Tubbo whispered, voice croaky. He was on the brink of consciousness, whatever energy he once had completely sapped. His head pounded and now half of his leg felt numb in addition to his torso. It had been a few days and he was supposed to feel better, not worse. It was all a disparaging nuisance; all he wanted was to be able to walk without feeling shooting pain. Was that so much to ask? Sympathetic, Tommy sat next to Tubbo on the smoothened cold floor of the ravine, hunching over by habit. The stone on the floor had once been jagged and rough, Tommy recalled. Weeks of constant, stress-induced pacing on sleepless nights from Wilbur had evened it out, however, as well as the regular back and forth of Techno farming his potatoes through the dusk until dawn. Tommy pretended he never noticed, but he worried for them both. Maybe more than he'd openly admit.

The blanketing silence between the two lead Tommy's head to thoughts he did not welcome. Ultimately feeling much too overwhelmed to look at his own wreck of knotted emotions, Tommy settled to focus on his friend first.

"Tubbo?" They lifted their head. "How do you feel, big guy?" Tommy's voice echoed through the narrow ravine despite him talking relatively quietly. Tubbo looked down at their hands, fiddling with the edges of his blood-splattered shirt sleeves. The blood always got everywhere.

Truthfully, Tubbo felt like he was going under a giant blanket labeled "well, fuck". Waves of mixed, heavy emotions crashed into him, only pulling away for him to wonder why. Why he had been caught, why Schlatt had been so cruel to play along when he knew, why Techno went back on his word and hurt him, why he hadn't done more to prevent this. He wondered when. When would the bloodstains be scrubbed off the podium? Or would they stay there forever, as a reminder of what happens to traitors? When would the smell of gunpowder finally leave his nose? When would L'manberg really be a place for people to go and emancipate tyranny and brutality? When would he be able to escape reliving those moments every waking hour?

When would he be home? He felt guilt, shame, fear, and shock stuck on loop in his head, memories he knew he couldn't and wouldn't ever forget spinning him around until he felt dizzy enough to pass out. Guilt, because Tommy's brothers were falling apart, paying no mind to the people they ruined and neither of them could do anything about it. Guilt because maybe, maybe, if Tubbo had been a little bit more careful, a little bit more planned with his excuses, a little more exact on his disappearances and reappearances, maybe Schlatt wouldn't have known.

He felt scared. So scared that he'd die young, surrounded by war, chaos, disagreement, and destruction. Stuck in the crossfire without ever really getting the chance to live. They were only sixteen, for gods' sake. He still had a life of uncertainty and bad choices ahead of him, yet he felt like he wasn't going to survive long enough to know what feeling content was like without the constant threat of enemies and another war looming over his head.

He was scared he'd never feel safe again.

But Tubbo couldn't put all of that into a coherent sentence, let alone say it out loud. Saying it out loud made it tangible, it made it real, and he wasn't ready for that yet. Tubbo didn't want it to be real yet, what good would that do right now? So they looked at Tommy and repeated his question back to him.

"How do you feel?" Silence met the end of the question again. How did he feel? Tommy didn't know how he felt. Overwhelmed, maybe? Stressed? Worried? Frustrated? Absolutely fucked? Nothing seemed to fit what he was feeling exactly, no matter how much he thought about it. He didn't want to think about it anymore.

"I'm gonna be honest... I really don't want to think about it." On cue, Tubbo leaned into Tommy with his good side, giving him the best side-hug as he could.

"Me neither." Tommy hugged them back, carefully slinging his arm around their shoulder. The two stayed in their moment of comfort, leaning on each other and watching the flickering light of the lantern on the textured gray walls, long enough for Tommy to feel dread seep through his stomach again. A strange urgency called to him.

"Tommy?" Tommy sat up, his slouch still visible, looking over at Tubbo.

"Yeah?"

"Do..." Tubbo paused, sucking in a breath and telling himself to think through the situation again before proposing his idea. He didn't want to think, though. He just wanted to do. He was sick of constant overthinking and planning. "Do you want to run away? For real?"

In almost any other situation, Tommy couldn't have said he was surprised. They had both talked about it, the idea filling up the moments they had together that weren't consisting of worrying over one plan or another. But now? With Tubbo recovering from a recent, deadly wound? With Wilbur going quite literally insane at the thought of complete destruction? With L'manberg still unfinished?

"For real?" Tommy repeated, a quizzical look on his face. "But Tubbo." He paused again. "There's still so much to do. I can't just leave everyone here. I can't just leave Wilbur when he's like this, there's no telling what stupid thing he'll do for the sake of his nation. And, for all I know, Skeppy's going to burn my discs the second he hears we're away. And Big T, look at yourself! It'll be days if not weeks before you're fully healed. There's no way we're going anywhere with you in this state. Don't be stupid." The last bit was nothing short of an order. Tommy couldn't help but be protective of Tubbo's health as the mood shifted. Neither of them was in a good place mentally, but it would ease something off their minds once Tubbo's gash closed up. Besides, Tommy could see everything going wrong if they tried to get on the road too early- someone them, Tubbo could manage to reopen his wound and bleed out his last life, they could run out of supplies due to the lack of actual preparation. Tommy may be reckless but, when it comes down to a situation that could very possibly lead to his friend's death, he didn't plan on being anything less than slightly overbearing. Just until Tubbo got better.

When moments of silence met his concerns, Tommy glanced over at Tubbo, waiting for a response.

"Then we give ourselves a few days. In that time, you try to talk Wilbur out of where he is now and do your best to secure at least the safety of your discs. I'll rest up or whatever and we'll both start gathering supplies and figuring out routes and what time of night we should leave and shit," Tubbo amended after his few moments of thinking, starting slowly. Tommy thought it over. He did like it a lot more than Tubbo's previous plan, but he still felt a pull anchoring him to Pogtopia. To L'manberg. To his brothers and the nation that started it all. To his friends. He had a duty here, a job, and he still felt he needed to fulfill it, even if running away was in his own best interest. Even if he was tired as fuck of fighting and having to lead and resolve other peoples' conflicts. He was supposed to be the one starting fires, not stomping them out.   
He could only imagine how tired Wilbur was.

"I don't know...." Tommy admitted, looking over at Tubbo again. He could practically see the weight he carried with him. He could see it in the way his eyes no longer shone as they used to, the way the dark circles lurked under his eyes. The way his eyebrows were pinched together in an emotion that couldn't be placed by Tommy and the way he could tell Tubbo was just as tired as he was. If he hadn't been here the past few weeks, Tommy would have had trouble believing that this was really Tubbo. Tommy let out a sigh and Tubbo straightened up. Usually, Tommy prioritized family above all else. Usually, Tommy would have more trouble accepting a sudden change like this, a change he could altogether avoid if he wanted to. But friends are just as important as family and he longed to welcome this change with his arms wide open. He wanted to leave this giant tangle of a mess behind just as much as Tubbo did, even if he had trouble admitting it to himself. 

"Please?"

What he can admit, what he knows for a fact, is that Tubbo really needs to take a break. Away from here. He also knows that he isn't letting them chance going anywhere alone. If he wants to run away from this place, so be it. Tommy would tag along. For Tubbo. Then he'd come straight back to Wilbur and Techno and L'manberg and his discs. He'd make everything right, as soon as he could, he promised himself.

But first, he wanted out.

"Four days. We have four days."

And for now, and until he was back, fuck L'manberg and every drop of blood that came with it.

He wanted to feel safe for a while.

**Author's Note:**

> i have the next chapter almost done but i'm not sure when i'll post it!  
> i hope you enjoyed! thank you so so much for reading :)  
> let me know if i succeeded in making you Feel Things and if you want more of my tommy and tubbo run away AU!!  
> i appreciate the hell out of any comments and kudos! <3


End file.
